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Wednesday, August 02, 2006
What You See Is Not What You Get: There is more to me than meets the eye

I find it unfair that I get undermined most of the time. Earlier today, I was told that I could be rich if I married a rich man, that my brother had the makings of someone who could be so and that my sister could be so because she was smart. What was wrong? Don't I have any skill to make it out in the world? I was then confused for my brother who would rather just sleep, eat, and play his video games. Excuse me, that is a low blow. People may see me on the computer most of the time but that does not mean that I waste my time doing pointless things. Just because I don't care to venture out of my room does not mean I am idle. I find it sad and infuriating when people pass judgement or misconstrue due to wreckless observation. I have grown tired of correcting these people. I've grown tired of trying to prove anything and everything to discriminating minds. I now work for myself. I try to aim for supremacy to please myself and so that I can be proud of myself. Through the years I have found that it is better to rely on internal motivation rather than external. Yes, man is a social animal but that doesn't mean that all aspects of our life are dependent on other people. When you count on and give yourself your full trust, it feels liberating. It feels good to be somewhat independent because you are the master, you only answer to yourself, you don't need to think about anyone else. Maybe I'm anti-social or cynical but I know that I have not experienced anything traumatic in the past that has lead me to my current views. People will fail you eventually in one way or another. At this point, I can't risk that. I'm working for myself. I'm trying to make something of myself. I want to be me because of me not because of anyone else. I'm out to prove a lot of people wrong.

Just so sad that from what they see, they quickly form generalizations.

Posted by Lex, 5:28:00 PM | Habeo in Animo | 0 Censere
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
State of the Nation Address


Yesterday was the president's SONA. It was pretty interesting since the cameras kept on focusing on some officials and legislators who weren't listening. Some didn't look impressed. One was actually texting. I remembered then what my former POLIGOV professor had told my class. During some sessions, these people that we choose to represent ourselves play around. I say this in the sense that they either sleep, do not listen, text and other things that shouldn't be done at the current period. Our professor had explained that in the United Kingdom, their place for parliamentary meetings consisted of a small room and members did not have their own tables, they sat on benches beside one another. This prevented people from lollygagging during sessions. Mahiya naman sila sa katabi nila kung makikipag text lang sila sa kung kanino.

I was wondering before it all started whether the president's speech would be in Filipino. I think it should have been in that language so that even the masses could and would be able to understand what she had said. I wondered why so many people who I think are only there to socialize were able to acquire seats. But then they may just be politicians' wives.

It amused me that she thanked the military for their loyalty and how after ever breath she took she was applauded. She had mentioned a budget that would be able to fight corruption, social disparity, terrorism and lawless violence. I wonder if this budget included the supposed amount to be given to pensioners since funds are being held back right now and only a few can seem to get their money. She had also mentioned that those who did not win in the elections should not let their loss be felt among the people. I laughed to myself remembering the "Hello, Garci" tapes. I laughed even more when I remembered the TV address she had made where in her make up artist seemed to have made her look pitiful. All through out her speech all I heard was fiscal reform and plans to make the country richer. She even made a bold statement that we would now be able to pay off our debts. That's great and all but will those even push through. I'm sorry but I have lost hope for our government's empty promises. One notable thing is the relocation of people from Manila to elsewhere. I see the changes in the highway almost everyday on my way to school. I wonder however if some officials are irked about that since they lose votes in the process of moving these people to provinces and free housing.

There were 5 things that was mentioned that was going to help our global competitiveness. Affordable food, reduction of the cost of electricity, modernizing infrastructures, technology dissemination and the reduction of redtape. These are feasible. The mobilization of these projects however would go back the the government budget. I remain skeptical about that. She mentioned the need for a constitutional change. Is that to prolong her term, avoid her impending cases or for the betterment of the country? A constitutional change would cost money too.

From what she had said it seems as if the DPWH will have a field day extended to months. I really do hope that this pushes through.

Our country has already sunk deeper. Hopefully, there is no way but up. But we could also explore uncharted regions by going further down.

Posted by Lex, 10:37:00 AM | Habeo in Animo | 0 Censere
Saturday, July 22, 2006
On Sexual Harrasment & Abuse



Yesterday in class, we discussed about rape. I don't really have much to say about it because I don't like thinking about it. It's horrible act. What drives men to force themselves on women? Do men not know the meaning of the word 'no'? I think it's very patriarichal of our society to even judge an innocent woman when she complains of a breech of her virtues. No woman asks to be raped. As for the men who get raped well, I feel sorry for them. I think their masculinity is stripped from them as well as their dignity. That's a big fall for their ego. It's just awful that some peole let their libido, instead of their brain, work and dictate their moves. In the process, a lot of people are run over. How can rape be avoided? Though social awareness may help to an extent but I don't think a sexual offender would stop to think about right and wrong and 'no' means 'no' when libido is on the rise. Hopefully, women (and men) would have enough physical energy to overcome their attacker. Mace or a taser gun, perhaps? Of course, that would require the victim to have enough wits to defend him or herself. I don't really see much of a solution to rape. I think that if people were going to have it diminished from society, eradication would have to be started by the people from within each and every possible rapist.

Posted by Lex, 7:02:00 AM | Habeo in Animo | 0 Censere
Thursday, July 20, 2006
The Library


I have my own spot in the library. Not really my own but a specific study carrell where in I automatically go to whenever I visit. I don't think that students nowadays see the beauty of the place. A myriad of shelves filled with books. Rows and rows of overwhelming tomes of knowledge and wisdom waiting to be opened, power waiting to be unleashed. Unfortunately, the books in the library are a bit roughed up. Proper care has not been upheld. Proper cataloguing is a little short too. Nevertheless, the library still has books. These books create the perfect scholarly and leisurely atmosphere. It would be better of the traces of time were clearly etched on the whole establishment. By this I mean I want the walls to be made of stone like the cathedrals. I want things to looks gothic infused with modernistic things. Esoteric architecture everywhere instead of pipes sticking out and moldy walls. But that may just be me and my taste for aesthetics. Still, the library is a haven for anyone who loves to learn.


Posted by Lex, 5:31:00 PM | Habeo in Animo | 0 Censere
Friday, July 14, 2006
Rainy Days And Mondays




"Rainy days and Mondays always get me down..."

That's a line from a Carpenters' song. I've observed that plenty of people abide by that. They agree that rainy days and Mondays aren't exactly the best days. I wonder if its my personality that dictates my going against this trend. I love it when it rains. It sometimes feels like the world is being cleansed through the cries of heaven. There's an unexplainable feeling that hovers over me when the clouds are dark. To me, it feels as if the world moves slower in a more somber mood and you get the chance to savor every second. Rainy days are the best for playing the piano. Every note pressed reverberates into the soul. Keys pressed produce billions of vibrations and these vibrations produce waves that produce sound, and sound, in turn, produces a melody. I recommend playing on a rainy night. Nothing can ever beat that. The ambience must always match the song. A Comme Amour by Richard Clayderman and the theme from Love Story by Henry Mancini are my picks for a midnight haunt on the piano. I can already imagine it. The pouring rain outside, the lights are out inside and the melancholy tinkling drains out every other noise there is. I can lose myself in that. I really think I can. Just feel what every succession of notes are trying to convey. I believe that there is a story in every melody and we just have to listen close enough to find it. The musical instrument is a pen and the air is a piece of paper.

Aside from rainy days, I like Mondays too. Mondays mean I get to go back to school. I may be one of a few who love going to school no matter the work load and complaining of high fatigue and stress. I like learning. I like being productive even though the outcome may not be the most excellent work I've done. I like filling my time with activities but I do spend time to just sit and watch the world pass by. There is just so much to do and so little time. I don't like being stagnant or being bored. Mondays mean that you get to look forward to the weekend. I think we appreciate the rest we get because we're swarmed with work most of the time. It's pretty much like happiness. You won't ever know what it is unless you've felt as if the forces of the universe are conspiring against you. They always go hand in hand, happiness and sadness, I mean.

Just a random thought:
It's sad that the country is so polluted that it isn't even advisable to bathe in the rain anymore. I miss walking with my bestfriend on a rainy monday talking about anything and everything.

Posted by Lex, 8:28:00 PM | Habeo in Animo | 0 Censere
Monday, July 10, 2006

On School Stuff



I hate RELSTWO, I really do. I do not like the subject at all. I do not see the point as to why every student must take 4 courses on Religion. But then again, the university has Catholic roots. I would still like to point out that the curriculum is for high-school students and the lessons are entirely irrelevant. The institution should let the students think for themselves or decide instead of force feeding them these things. They should encourage logical reasoning and a search for God instead of manufacturing mindless drones. I recommend Religious Theology. Thomas Aquainas for RELSONE, St. Anselm and his 5 Onthological Arguments for RELSTWO, along with the St. B-- who had proven his statements wrong, Descartes for RELSTRI (let's see those students lose their minds with him) and whomever for RELSFOR (probably Skinner and Kant for "What is Man?" since the rest have been "What/Who is God?"). I think those philosophers would exercise students' brain cells.

Posted by Lex, 8:22:00 PM | Habeo in Animo | 0 Censere
Friday, June 30, 2006
On Music Appreciation

How sad that not a lot of people from my generation can listen to classical music and find the beauty in it. They don't find the time to listen to what the notes try to convey. There's a story to every song out there even if does not have words. Anyway, when I have children, I hope they'd share my love for classical music or just be able to listen to everything and find that one that you connect to and that talks to you.
P.S.
People who can't seem to digest old music should listen to Maksim Mvrica or Michael Buble. Modernizing songs of yesterday. Very innovative.
i just noticed the incoherent mumbo jumbo I put in here when I was in high school. And to think these are are supposed to be assignment answers on Computer Science.

Posted by Lex, 11:33:00 PM | Habeo in Animo | 0 Censere