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Wednesday, August 02, 2006
What You See Is Not What You Get: There is more to me than meets the eye

I find it unfair that I get undermined most of the time. Earlier today, I was told that I could be rich if I married a rich man, that my brother had the makings of someone who could be so and that my sister could be so because she was smart. What was wrong? Don't I have any skill to make it out in the world? I was then confused for my brother who would rather just sleep, eat, and play his video games. Excuse me, that is a low blow. People may see me on the computer most of the time but that does not mean that I waste my time doing pointless things. Just because I don't care to venture out of my room does not mean I am idle. I find it sad and infuriating when people pass judgement or misconstrue due to wreckless observation. I have grown tired of correcting these people. I've grown tired of trying to prove anything and everything to discriminating minds. I now work for myself. I try to aim for supremacy to please myself and so that I can be proud of myself. Through the years I have found that it is better to rely on internal motivation rather than external. Yes, man is a social animal but that doesn't mean that all aspects of our life are dependent on other people. When you count on and give yourself your full trust, it feels liberating. It feels good to be somewhat independent because you are the master, you only answer to yourself, you don't need to think about anyone else. Maybe I'm anti-social or cynical but I know that I have not experienced anything traumatic in the past that has lead me to my current views. People will fail you eventually in one way or another. At this point, I can't risk that. I'm working for myself. I'm trying to make something of myself. I want to be me because of me not because of anyone else. I'm out to prove a lot of people wrong.

Just so sad that from what they see, they quickly form generalizations.

Posted by Lex, 5:28:00 PM

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